Balthamos felt the death of Baruch the moment it happened. He cried aloud and soared into the night air over the tundra, flailing his wings and sobbing his anguish into the clouds; and it was some time before he could pose himself and go back to Will, ide awake, knife in hand, peering up into the damp and chilly murk. They were ba Lyras world.
"What is it?" said Will as the angel appeared trembling beside him. "Is it danger? Get behind me...」
"Baruch is dead," cried Balthamos, "my dear Baruch is dead...」
"When? Where?"
But Balthamos couldnt tell; he only khat half his heart had beeinguished. He couldnt keep still: he flew up again, sc the sky as if to seek out Baru this cloud or that, calling, g, calling; and then hed be overe with guilt, and fly down te Will to hide and keep quiet, and promise to watch over him tirelessly; and then the pressure of his grief would crush him to the ground, and hed remember every instance of kindness and ce that Baruch had ever shown, and there were thousands, and hed fotten none of them; and hed cry that a nature so gracious could never be snuffed out, and hed soar into the skies again, casting about in every dire, reckless and wild and stri, cursing the very air, the clouds, the stars.
Finally Will said, "Balthamos, e here."
The angel came at his and, helpless. Shivering inside his cloak, iter cold gloom of the tundra, the boy said to him, "You must try to keep quiet now. You know there are things out there thatll attack if they hear a noise. I protect you with the knife if youre nearby, but if they attack you up there, I wont be able to help. And if you die, too, thatll be the end for me. Balthamos, I need you to help guide me to Lyra. Please dont fet that. Baruch was strong, be strong, too. Be like him for me."
At first Balthamos didnt speak, but then he said, "Yes. Yes, of course I must. Sleep now, Will, and I shall stand guard, I shant fail you."
Will trusted him; he had to. And presently he fell asleep again.
When he woke up, soaked with dew and cold to his bohe angel was standing nearby. The sun was just rising, and the reeds and the marsh plants were all tipped with gold.
Before Will could move, Balthamos said, "Ive decided what I must do. I shall stay with you day and night, and do it cheerfully and willingly, for the sake of Baruch. I shall guide you to Lyra, if I , and then I shall guide you both to Lord Asriel. I have lived thousands of years, and unless I am killed, I shall live many thousands of years more; but I never met a nature that made me so ardent to do good, or to be kind, as Baruchs did. I failed so many times, but each time his goodness was there to redeem me. Now its not, I
shall have to try without it. Perhaps I shall fail from time to time, but I shall try all the same."
"Then Baruch would be proud of you," said Will, shivering.
"Shall I fly ahead now and see where we are?"
"Yes," said Will, "fly high, and tell me what the lands like farther on. Walking on this marshland is going to take forever."
Balthamos took to the air. He hadnt told Will everything he was anxious about, because he was trying to do his best and not worry him; but he khat the angel Metatron, the Regent, from whom theyd escaped so narrowly, would have Wills face firmly imprinted on his mind. And not only his face, but everything about him that angels were able to see, including parts of which Will himself was not aw